I read this morning there had been a loss of life. As I read the circumstances of a sleep deprived driver going the wrong way I became aware that there are occasions, especially relating to death when the English language seems to be severely lacking.
There is no "right" age or circumstance that makes the death of a loved one or even a pet more tolerable. The heartache and heartbreak of death is experienced differently every second of the rest of your life. Personally I do not believe that time heals. I don't say this as a negative! A broken heart will forever be a broken heart. Once shattered it can learn to adapt to it's brokenness but it remains broken. I believe it is our broken hearts that connect us and often strengthens the bond to others that will or have felt the waves of grief.
What words could possibly be spoken that would comfort another? What words can truly express the feelings of those touched by loss and if I am the one grieving, what words can lift the veil? How do we communicate death to a child or someone child like? How do we respond to a grieving heart that can distract enough to allow just a moment of relief? We have words that can cut us to the bone but what words bring comfort? I think it isn't so much the pain and heartache but more the anguish that leaves us broken without words.
It is my experience that the sadness of death is like a tsunami that floods the heart with grief. Friends and family are swept in as the words are spoken announcing the loss and collectively but uniquely we rage against the force of the waters. Waters that have (this time) spared us and taken a loved one. As the waves continue to crash on the shore we stop thrashing as often and allow our broken hearts to ride the waves that are rhythmically lifting us to the next sunrise.
Life is precious. Loss is life changing. Love is kind.
